Fantasy Fiascoes: Week 1

Every week we set our fantasy lineups, and we expect the guys we invested highly in to produce accordingly. Every week someone lets us down. It’s rare to find that perfect week, in which all your starters are lights out and you win by 50 points. It’s infuriating to lose because your stud players just don’t show up. For purposes of this article, I will avoid listing players who had bad weeks due to injury. With that said, let’s vent about the fiascoes from this week.

Quarterbacks

Deshaun Watson

This dude was a top 5 pick at QB. Everyone was counting on the electric play we saw last season. Well, finishing at QB23 for the week is just atrocious. The good news is he was able to run for 40 yards. The bad news is he didn’t look like a very good QB. Maybe it was just the Pats D. Maybe he’s not as good as we thought. I don’t really care either way, but he needs to find a way to be better, or anyone who drafted him is in serious trouble.

Matthew Stafford

What in the actual fuck was he doing? He looked like a slight upgrade to Nathan Peterman. Stafford probably wasn’t a top 8 pick at QB, but plenty of people started him. I mean, he’s had 7 straight seasons with 4,000 passing yards. He puts up solid fantasy points on a consistent basis. Let’s hope Matt Patricia isn’t going to completely screw that up. Sam Darnold looked worlds ahead on Stafford. Maybe he will remember how to play QB by week 2?

Running Backs

David Johnson

He saved his say with a late TD, but he did nothing outside of that. DJ was consistently a top 3 pick in drafts. 67 total yards ain’t cutting it. He is supposed to be matchup proof. Based on that performance, he’s not. It looks like the Cardinals are going to stink this year, and it might hurt Johnson’s value. But note to the HC: JOHNSON NEEDS MORE TOUCHES. I don’t care what the score is, he’s your best players. Use him!

LeSean McCoy

Yikes. Initiate panic mode. This is less about McCoy, and more about the Bills being one of the wort teams ever assembled. Those guys are an embarrassment to the NFL. If the match up is even remotely tough, McCoy is probably going to have a long day. There isn’t one person around him that will make his job easier. Not to mention, he only had eight touches. EIGHT. Maybe game script was to blame, but guess what? They will be losing in every damn game. He was RB66 this week. Players like that don’t even belong on fantasy rosters.

Kareem Hunt

Umm, what? 16 carries is pretty good. 49 total yards is not. I’m not going to do the math, but that’s not a great average. To top it off, he had as many catches as I did this week. That can’t happen for Hunt. Like ever. I wouldn’t panic if I owned him, but this week sucked, and you probably lost because of it.

Wide Receivers

Chris Hogan

He’s the #1 receiver for the Patriots. That has to mean something, right? RIGHT!? How does he end up with one Goddamn catch? Phillip Dorsett had more targets than Hogan. I mean, WTF? This one goes to Belichick for constantly screwing fantasy owners. Good luck figuring this shit out.

Amari Cooper

So yeah, the Raiders are going to stink. Gruden isn’t fixing this mess. We kept hearing how Gruden loved Cooper, and how he was the guy, and how he’d have 1,000 yards this year. Well, not a good start. He had 9 yards on 3 targets. And they were losing most of the night. They were forced to throw, and they didn’t throw to their best receiver. He’s so talented and they are going to ruin him. Fantastic. And while it was happening, I was forced to listen to Jason Witten call the game. Not a great night.

Tight Ends

Jimmy Graham

Aaron Rodgers never produces a top tier TE. I don’t have any idea why, but that trend continued in Week 1. Two catches for eight yards. That’s just garbage. If I drafted him, I’d be angry and worried. Next week he gets the Vikings. That match up is less than ideal. He better figure something out quick. The most likely scenario is he continues to stink until everyone benches him, the he blows up. Because fantasy.

Charles Clay

As noted above, the Bills suck. He had zero catches. I hate TEs. They always let us down. I’m not even going to pile it on here, because I feel bad for anyone who is on that team.

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